by the Way . . .

The Vice President shot a lawyer and the whole press corps is up in arms about who knew what and when did they know it and why was the scoop given to the local press instead of all those reporters hunting for stories at the White House. The shooting took place just as the hunting was getting good Saturday evening. That is when the quail settle back into a field for a drink and the evening. The Corpus Christi Caller-Times got it Sunday morning but it wasn't until the Monday morning press conference that the big reporters got it. The complaining was such that the White House press office even had to put out an email Monday afternoon entitled "Response to a Question from the Briefing" that began "Q: So when did the president definitively know that the vice president had shot somebody?". This shows that Katrina has sunk in. There won't have to be Congressional hearings this time.

Then there are the jokes: "Cheney bags lawyer" and "according to the best intelligence available there were quail hidden in the bush". And opinions from Ambassador Pamela about who was at fault. All this is poppycock. To understand these events you need a grasp of history, law, custom and ballistics. As usual, this blog will pull all this together.

When the vice president shot somebody in 1804, Thomas Jefferson didn't make any announcement. Aaron Burr left town, but soon came back when there wasn't any fuss. Nor was there a bunch of discussion of who was at fault, even though it was clearly Dr. Charles D. Cooper (no relation, I think)who published the insult that led to everyone getting their back up. Likewise Hamilton, who was also armed, elected to waste his shot.

As for the law in Texas, regardless of what you hear, it is illegal to shoot lawyers. Except in self defense, of course. And you don't have to retreat first, like you do in those sissy states. Cheney will be fined $7, but that is for a related offense. Cheney did not have a quail stamp, which is a crime if it involves firearms. Sure it came up because of the lawyer shooting, but that doesn't make it the proximate cause of the fine.

The customs that govern bird hunting are also clear. If you are 30 yards behind a fellow hunter and an alleged quail flies up between you, and you see the other hunter rotate to bring his firearm to bear on you, you are supposed to yell "SHEEEEIT!!" and hit the dirt. This lawyer waited until after the shot to do both. Likewise the ballistics in this case are impressive. The VEEP was using a 28 gauge Perazzi that shoots about 250 pellets. He had that Perazzi choked down to where it threw a 12 inch pattern at 30 yards (as you can see on the lawyer). You have to be an excellent shot to hope to hit any quail with such a pattern. So on top of it all, the VEEP was for giving all a sporting chance.

Back to what did he know and when did he know it, it was revealed Tuesday that someone in the hunting party called the Situation Room shortly after the shooting, said there was an accident, but did not reveal that the VP was himself the shooter. They say they don't know who called, but I don't have the number for the Situation Room, do you? Anyway, the staff there told Andrew Card, the chief of staff, who told the president, but again no identification of the shooter. Fortunately, after Card told Karl Rove, Karl became curious about it, and called the ranch's owner, who stool pigeoned. So the president knew about 8pm Saturday. So what was he supposed to do? Call FEMA?